By Takiela Bynum©
Mirror mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?
Most ladies would immediately recognize this line from the movie Snow White. Snow White’s evil step mother, the queen, asks the enchanted mirror this question constantly. The queen is obsessed with being the most beautiful of all.
That’s a fairytale, but this is life.
In our society, we too, are obsessed with beauty. As a matter of fact, we are consumed with it. We live in a world governed by beauty, not naturally flawed beauty, but artificially perfected beauty. Unfortunately, the media defines beauty and we (the public) imitate it. The rule, by which beauty is measured in this day and age, is critical and cruel.
But I’d like to ask, what is beauty really? Beauty is defined as “a combination of qualities, such as shape, color, or form, which pleases the aesthetic senses, especially the sight.” However, beauty is much more than what is expressed in this vague definition, wouldn’t you agree?
This is what I hear young ladies saying about themselves: I’m ugly. I’m fat. My skin is too dark. My hair is too short/long, curly/straight, thick/thin, etc. My boobs are too big/small. My derriere is too big/small. The list is unbelievably endless.
Ladies, I beg you, do NOT allow society to dictate the image of beauty. God is the Creator of beauty; however, the world has devised a cheap imitation of what beauty is and, sadly, we’ve bought into the lie. The time has come for us to get a refund on our purchase.
The truth of God’s word will always negate the lies of the world.
In Genesis 1:26a and 27 NIV it says “26a And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. 27So God created man in His own image, in the image of God created He him; male and female created He them.”
These scriptures are saying that we are created in His image and in His likeness. We are the reflection of God. He created us. Every cell, fingerprint, hair follicle, etc. that is strung together to form a complete body, is created by God, Himself.
Every time we refer to ourselves as anything but beautiful, I would imagine is a direct insult to the One who created us. Whenever we speak against our bodies, believe an untruth regarding our bodies, or even desire to permanently alter our bodies, God is not only aware of it but He is affected by it. It hurts Him. Sweetie, we don’t realize that God already knows what we are thinking before the thought is formed in our mind. He is connected to us more than a mother is connected to the child she is carrying in her womb. He has put time, creativity, love, desire, beauty, into dust and added His breath thus a precious life is formed.
Now, His creation has the audacity to complain about what He has created in His own image? Insinuating that His masterpiece is a mess therefore taking matters into our own hands and fixing what He didn’t get right in the creation process. Can you imagine how hurt He must feel?
God wants us to accept ourselves as the beautiful masterpiece He designed. Each time we look at our reflection in the mirror we should be reminded of God. He created us to be an imperfectly perfect image of Himself and that alone is worthy of praise.
By Lynn Cowell
So you’ve got kids that are dating, or will be before you wish they would. Just the word “dating” brings back so many memories. Like the time you thought you had a date to prom; until he found someone “better” or when your best friend told that guy in lunch block you were crushing on him…and it crushed you because he wasn’t crushing back.
To be honest, it isn’t rejection that scares me when it comes to my kids and dating. It’s more the Doctor Jekell and Mr. Hyde thing. My concern is they will feel pressure to become someone they are not, all for the look they’re dying to get. The attention they want desperately to have.
And so, I did what any normal mom would do. I wrote a book. (Ok – maybe that is not so normal, but you’ve got to work with what God gave you and God gave me words).
While writing this book, this book called Magnetic: Becoming the Girl He Wants, I interviewed guys (because the book is for girls). Lots of them. Guys who were in middle school, high school, college and newly married. I asked them questions:
- What are you looking for in a girl?
- What do you find unattractive in a girl?
- What do you think of girl drama?
I asked these questions because these are the types of questions girls ask me in our Q&A time at my events. Girls want to know.
I found many guys don’t want a girl to change. As in become someone she is not. Instead, these guys help me to share with girls, through words and video, that often what I call the “captivating characteristics” and what the Bible calls the fruit of the Spirit is exactly what attracts godly guys to godly girls. Traits like love, joy and peace – something a bit lacking these days.
So, when a girl focuses on becoming the girl He wants – the girl God created to reach her fullest potential in Him – that can be very attractive to a godly guy. It’s like a two-for-one deal!
Today, I’d like to share with you a free resource – the video “What a Guy Wants” as well as the free discussion questions. Take a night this week and make it a girl’s night – you and your girl. Add a few of her friends too. Watch the video and talk about guys. Help your girl take one step closer to becoming the girl He wants. (Not the guy in the video, but the guy named Jesus).
ABOUT THE BOOK
Packed with revealing quizzes, interviews with guys, and practical tools, Magnetic empowers you to:
o Move beyond negative thoughts, capricious emotions, and others’ opinions as you gain unshakeable confidence
o Limit the draining affect of “girl drama” so you can invest your time in becoming the best you.
o Replace the agonizing frustration of wanting to be noticed and liked with a deep assurance that you already are.
As you live out nine amazing characteristics—known as the fruit of the Spirit—you will not only cultivate an inner and outer beauty, but you will also hold an irresistible appeal for godly guys. Shift your focus from a guy to the Guy and become the magnetic young woman God created you to be.
Need a tool to help your daughter learn to wait on God? Check out Lynn’s newest release: Magnetic: Becoming the Girl He Wants. Connect with Lynn more on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter at Lynn Cowell.
By Tracy Steel
I’ve read through several debates surrounding the movie, 50 Shades of Grey. Some mothers plan to watch the film even though they will not allow their daughters anywhere near the books or upcoming movie.
I applaud these mothers for not allowing their girls to read or watch 50 Shades, but it troubles me that they’ve read it; anxious to view it on the big screen.
For if 50 Shades is purely fictional, and a beautiful “redemption” story then why not let your daughter watch it with you? If its sexual images will quickly exit your mind after the movie ends, then won’t these same images quickly leave her mind too?
A lot of people are saying this film is harmless. Why are you telling your daughter it is harmful?
There is a deeper reason explaining why you will not let your daughter see 50 Shades. There is a deeper reason why we mamas should not watch the pornography and violence esteemed in this movie either.
And it is simply this…
God does not want the eyes of our daughters feasting on filth since He created them in His image and calls them to be holy. (Genesis 1:26-27, 1 Peter 1:15-16) Mamas, we must not forget that we are also daughters and image bearers of this same God. I do not believe He wants us to feast on filth even though our “freedom” and a movie rating allow us to do so.
So please stop.
You are called to be holy as your Heavenly Father is holy.
Saying one thing, but living out another angers, frustrates, and divides. Hypocrisy cripples our relationship with our daughter and our Heavenly Father.
The 1 thing I appreciate about this movie is that it makes me pause and reflect on my own integrity as a mother. I should not hide any of my choices from my daughter. I should not use a movie rating, or the “when you get older you’ll be able to handle it” excuse, as continual crutches either.
Fellow mamas, 50 Shades is giving me an opportunity to give my daughter my heart.
I wonder what my daughter would think and feel if I said: “I am not going to view this film because I wish for you to do the same. If this movie isn’t good enough for you, it isn’t good enough for me. I will lay aside my freedom to watch this, simply because I love you. I want my wishes for your actions to mimic the reality of my actions.”
“You are not allowed to see the movie, but I am going out to have fun and watch this movie. Someday you will understand.”
“Whoops, I didn’t intend for you to find this particular book under my bed or on my Kindle. Um, no you cannot read it even though I did.”
Which response esteems my daughter instead of making her feel inferior or incompetent? Which response promotes doing life together authentically versus doing life separate and falsely?
image courtesy of Salvatore Vuono/freedigitalphotos.net
My prayer is that you feel prompted to pause and reflect if you still desire to watch this movie. We must be intentional about possessing integrity, so our relationship with our daughter AND our Heavenly Father remains honest and holy. May we allow the Holy Spirit to show us if going to this movie opens the door of hypocrisy. And if He does, we must say NO to 50 Shades of Grey in front of our daughters and for our daughters.
That “someday,” when our daughter will understand why we viewed the movie but forbid her to do the same may never come. We may not have someday, but we still have today.
Esteem integrity over filth.
The Whatever Girls ministry is honored and proud to partner with the “Old Fashioned Movie“, which releases in theaters on Valentines Day. I had the opportunity to watch the Old Fashioned Movie this past summer with my 16 year old daughter. We both loved the movie! This is my endorsement that is featured in the endorsement section on the “Old Fashioned Movie” website:
“Finally, a movie that reinforces the messages I’ve been teaching my teenage daughter and ministry audience: Lust lasts a moment, but true love lasts a lifetime!”
Our ministry’s core values are: Whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy. The Old Fashioned Movie is all of these things, and we want to encourage you to support this wonderful movie by joining us for “50 Hours of Prayer” before the movie releases, and seeing the movie at the theater on opening day or weekend, and by inviting your friends and family to join our “50 Hours of Prayer”.
We believe equipping young women and their mothers with tools and resources that highlight our core values will empower them to choose God’s best for their lives. If you are a writer/blogger who has written an article about the dangers of watching the other movie debuting on Valentines Day, “Fifty Shades of Grey”, we invite you to link your article below. (Articles written from a place of mean spiritiedness negativity and will be removed from the link up.)
Prayer Requests from our friends at the “Old Fashioned Movie“:
- Pray for the release- that the movie will touch hearts all over the nation
- Purity in our nation when it comes to romance and dating
- That married couples who stand in front of the movie theater February 14th looking for a movie – will choose old fashioned over Fifty shades of Grey
- Dating couples to go see old fashioned and be inspired and directed to implement old fashioned values in their relationship
- That teens and young adults will be directed to this movie to see a healthy view of relationships and marriage
- However you feel led to pray, please do
Check out the “Old Fashioned Movie” website for blog posts, videos, discussion guides and more. Be sure to like their Facebook page and follow them on Twitter, too.
If you would like to help spread the word about our “50 Hours of Prayer” please share this post and add this blog button to your website by grabbing the code at the bottom of this post.
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By Madi Cowell
Cleaning my room, the word inspire popped into my head. Each year I love to choose one word that I feel like God is calling me to push towards and become. This year, inspire is my word. This word is a little different from the kinds I usually choose such as: obedience, compassion, or patience. There was a major point God was trying to get across to me through this exact encounter with Him about my word for the year. It made me reminisce on why this word meant so much to me.
I thought back on all the important people in my life that encouraged me in massive ways to continue forward, whether or not they even knew it. I thought of all the times I witnessed beauty from the women around me, my co-workers, parents, friends, you name it, and how badly I want to strive to be like them. As a teenager it is definitely not easy to keep that positive outlook on life but I decided I want more. By the grace of God I have been saved and forgiven; I have been shown true life and beauty and that is what we are here for, girls. To go out and show that insane divine love to the ones who have never felt it for their own. I want to be a bearer of good news to the world when they’re filled with so much negativity around them. How can we impact the ones around us, but for the better? What little things can you do to change someone’s day? If we are made in the image of Christ then surely people will notice there is something different within all of us, we can go out and inspire. My favorite verse in the bible comes from Isaiah 55:12, “You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands.” The world is waiting for good news, to be lead, to be inspired. Although sometimes it seems that the society around us is slipping into a very negative generation that is all false news. We know the truth, and it is our job to remind the people around us with doubt, depression, anger, jealousy, or anything that we can all struggle with, that the world is a beautiful place. God gave his only son so that we may have refuge and not try to do it all on our own.
Make a point today to find in your life one person who has inspired you. Shoot them a text or give them a call and remind them just how much they mean to you. It’s your turn to keep the cycle going.