By Erin Bishop
It’s homecoming season, so it’s the perfect time to pull this gem, “You Owe Him Nothing” by Kim Chaffin, out of the Whatever Girls archives. Give it a read and come back to the rest of this post.
When homecoming and prom invitations have become as elaborate as marriage proposals, and all eyes are on you, you need to know that you still owe him nothing.
He may have just asked you to homecoming or prom in front of your entire math class with a dozen roses, balloons, and a teddy bear, but you still owe him nothing.
He may have just spent a fortune on a dance ticket, flowers, dinner, and pictures, but you still owe him nothing.
He may have been your boyfriend for months, and you hope to marry him some day, but you still owe him nothing.
Girls, you do not have to say “yes” when every part of you wants to say “no”, or even a small part of you wants to say “no”. It doesn’t matter how many people are watching, or what you think will happen to your reputation if you say “no”.
Let me be clear. When a guy decides that he is going to ask a girl on a date, he knows there is a chance that he’s going to get rejected. He chooses to put himself out there, whether publicly, or privately, and it is not your responsibility to protect his ego. Your responsibility is to choose God’s best for your life. Sometimes that even means saying “no” when you want to say “yes”.
The right guy wants what’s best for you. Even if that means he doesn’t get what he wants. The right guy will protect you from situations where your values could be compromised, and he points you closer to God, not further away.
So how do you say “no”? It’s easy. You politely say: “No, thank you”. That’s it. Say anything else, and you’ll have dug yourself into a hole.
We live in a world where we go to great lengths to spare everyone’s feelings at the expense of our own integrity and comfort. Don’t go there, it leads you down a road called “approval addiction” and the farther you travel down it, the harder it is to remember your way back.
By Lynn Cowell
As youth investors, we see it as our responsibility to mark out the clear road to success. We preach purity. Give guidelines on girlfriends. Teach faithful friendships.
But maybe we’re missing something big.
Preparing teens for trouble.
Jesus said, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33 (NIV)
Jesus made sure His disciples knew – tough stuff is around the corner! You will have trouble. He didn’t mince words. He didn’t dance around the subject of hard times. He didn’t say, “You might have trouble…” or “If you have trouble…” Nope. He was clear, “You will have trouble.”
But, He didn’t just leave them with this depressing news. In the prior verses, He gave them clear direction. The Holy Spirit will guide you. My Father will give you what you ask for in My name. Find peace in Me. Put your hope in Me…no matter what.
Jesus never promised us sunshine and fun times every day; quite the opposite. If we do not prepare teens for trouble or worse yet, we constantly shield them from pain, we are doing them a terrible disservice. Trouble might take place tomorrow…it might take place today. We must prepare them.
Join us for #WhenMomsPray. Today’s prayer for our daughters is inspired by Lynn’s article you just read. Click HERE to learn about #WhenMomsPray and to join us.
By Erin Bishop
Yesterday a memory from 10-13 years ago resurfaced. It wasn’t just a single memory; it was also the reminder of how I have changed.
My son (11) was taking his time getting the last few things done before we had to leave for school and my frustrations mounted as I looked at the clock. I felt myself wanting to yell at him. But by God’s grace, I didn’t. I was able to keep it together.
That’s when the memory came back. When my daughter was that age, and even younger, I wouldn’t have held back. I would have yelled at her and 9 times out 10 she would have started crying, which would have frustrated me even more, and both of our days would start out horribly.
“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4 (NLT)
As I thought about that, I looked at my son and was reminded about how sensitive his spirit is, and I longed to go back in time and change the way I treated my daughter. My anger would chip away at her little spirit; I could see it in her eyes.
We can’t go back and change the things from yesterday, but today is a new day, fresh with opportunities to do better.
Today’s article was inspired by the #WhenMomsPray daily prayer. You can read more about #WhenMomsPray, HERE. We would love to have you join us!